Lament Don’t Just Vent

Traditional psychotherapy is often classified as “talk therapy.”  It is a therapeutic release to vent the pent-up emotions like a geyser in your soul. 

Venting is usually negative and hopeless or angry and vindictive.  It doesn’t sound pretty and sure isn’t dignified. Too often those rumblings from the depth of our souls can sound petty and irrational. 

A good therapist will hold space and help you press your “pause” on impulsive reactionary behavior.  For example, “Just because you feel like killing your neighbors’ noisy chickens, it is probably not a good idea to do it.  There are other ways to manage the circumstances.  It begins with you getting calm to think rationally.” 

The other thing about venting is it is full of debris that is not anywhere close to the holiness of God.  This can be a problem for a Believer who is trying their best to “be holy for Christ is holy.” 

So, what do you do with this troublesome part of our inner human world?  Too often a “good Christian” will stuff those thoughts, words, feelings, until the pressure goes sideways to disrupt a perfectly constructed life.  Hidden sin has a way of finding its way to the top ….eventually.

Biblical Psychotherapy:

God is not offended with our humanity.  He made us.  He knows our quirks.  He knows we can be messy.  He knows we are broken.  That is why He came to be our Savior.  He challenged us to be transformed. He gave us the tool of “Lamenting” which is complaining to God since He is the only one with the power to change anything.

King David, the man after God’s heart, was one of the most impulsive people whose story was ever recorded.  He had big emotions.  He could go deep and tender to “I hate them, too” (Psalm 139.)  He recorded his laments, or complaints, in the Psalms.  But as you read the venting of his messy soul, you will see at some point he turns his eyes upward. In Psalms 22, he took his “but you, O Lord” to “I will tell.” 

A big tool of psychotherapy is journaling.  Writing your thoughts and feelings focuses on the issue and organizes your thoughts. The Biblical challenge is not to just identify your feelings with the self-awareness, but to surrender them to leadership of Christ. How? 

Here is where the gospel tools of our Christian faith come in to give us peace. 

1)       Tell Jesus about our troubles. (He cares about what we care about.)

2)       Own our sinful responses. (The word is “confess.”)

3)       Surrender.  (The word is “repent.”  Change your mind and actions.  Turn around.)

4)       See God in your story. (Worship is to connect to the Big God in your spirit.)

5)       Hear His truth. (Pause to listen to His thoughts.  It may be a scripture or  wise thoughts.)

Write your laments by prayer journaling the frustrations and pains in your soul to change perspective.

Love and Truth: To complain is human. To lament is a Christian’s faith in action.